Day 19

Addie's ANC is up to 50 FINALLY!  This is the highest its been since it fell from 60 about a week ago.  She has 3 different oncologists on her case and her doctor today said he would feel most comfortable with keeping her here until we saw her ANC at 100.  Her doctor yesterday (I think) would have let us go home today since she had 2 consecutive days of it increasing.  Of course we all want to go home, however we don't want to go home to return back the next day, so I am ok with her doctor leaning on the side of caution.  Other then her ANC, all of her other {big} numbers are also going up! Her platelets doubled from yesterday which her doc said is a great sign that her bone marrow is producing new and healthy cells!  Her Monocytes are also in the double digits and holding steady which is another relief (they were at 0 up until 3 days ago).  The Monocytes are what create Neutrophils and the Neutrophils are what make up the ANC - along with the White Blood Cells.  I keep joking that I will be an Oncologist when this is all said and done, being that we are receiving a crash course everyday on blood and how cancer affects it!  I will never look at another CBC test the same again!

Other than that, not much to report (always a good thing).  I am itching for us to get home and return to some sort of normalcy.  I am excited to throw myself back into work - I truly miss it and connecting with everyone so much! As most know, Fall is my absolute FAVORITE time of the year and being that is is finally September, there is so much to look forward to!  The smells, the cozy sweaters, the boots - I want it all!  The amount of "retail therapy" that I have been doing is kind of insane.  Shame on you online shopping for being way too easy to do from a hospital room!  I can't wait for Addie and I to decorate when we get home as we do every year, and fill our home with leaves and Pumpkin Spice EVERYTHING!  I miss Jakers LIKE CRAZY and have only been able to see him twice over the last 3 weeks.  He is currently staying with Nick's parents and I am grateful to them for giving him a loving home and lots of attention while we are away.   I think I may try and film a little update video to my YT channel tomorrow when I am home for a little with Bentley - keep you posted on that.  I miss you guys so much!

As Dan and I have been saying from Day 2 (Day 1 we were still in shock/numb), things can be SO much worse for us.  We have heard such sad stories from some of the nurses here about other kiddos on her floor and their sad circumstances.  I just saw on the news about the beautiful 22 year old girl who was murdered on Temple University's campus (my alma mater).  And of course Hurricane Harvey and all that it has left behind (not to mention the fear of Irma hitting the US next).  To even be safe in a hospital that isn't being evacuated is a wonderful thing that we are not taking for granted.  It makes me so sad that others haven't been as fortunate.  All of these sad things happening to others and around the country / world really keep everything into perspective for us.  Addie's friends all started school today without her, and the constant photos on FB and IG of everyone's kids on their first day of school definitely puts a knot in my stomach.  I know that if I really stopped to dwell on it, I would end up on the floor and it would be hard to pick myself up.  But I am staying hopeful that she will be rejoining her friends at school before she knows it, and really won't remember ever missing out.  She needs to get healthy and that is what matters right now.  There will always more"first days of school" to come.

As hard as this time is on us and incredibly tough at times - things can always be worse.  So in a sort of weird way, we are grateful to at least be in the position we are in with this.  The fact that the this disease is so well researched and her doctors know exactly what they are doing and how to beat ALL.  We are so thankful that Addie is already responding so well to treatment and handling it all like the little Warrior Princess that she is (she still doesn't want to go home!).  In tough times we always have a choice.  We can let it defeat us and define us, or we can push through the mud and overcome, only to come out stronger than ever.  I'll always choose the 2nd option because the alternative doesn't help anyone (and really, who wants to be defined by cancer?!). I say this all with ease thanks to the incredible support we are constantly surrounded with.  I always say that in these tough times, you truly see who your friends are, and I could not be more proud of the friendships we have and the families that we come from.  It wouldn't be easy to stay so positive and continue pushing past the sadness without them - and of course all of you ;).  Thank you again, for all of your prayers, good vibes and love.  You will never know how much you all mean and how much it has helped.  I love that one day our girl will be able to look back at the "army" of people and prayers she had behind her helping her fight this fight.  I wish she could comprehend just how loved she truly is - even by people she has never even met.



With Gratitude <3